Recap That Noise: Vampire Diaires, 2.13 Daddy Issues

Caroline is leaving her house when she runs into Tyler, who wants to talk. Caroline thinks it’s about the kiss and tells him that Matt is still in the picture so she can’t offer him anything beyond her friendship. He counters by asking what happened to Mason. She plays dumb a little until he confronts her about Damon and Stefan being vampires, more specifically vampires who killed his uncle. She makes a feeble attempt to explain but Ty is hurt, pushing her against a car. He laments trusting her before taking off.

Damon is in his bathroom, taking a shower. It is glorious. I think I’ve watched it close to a million times. He is listening to the news, a story about the campers and park ranger that Jules attacked during the full moon. But mostly Damon wanders around without a shirt.

Sexiest shower ever.

John is watching television in the Gilbert kitchen when Elena enters, questioning what he’s doing in Mystic Falls. He says he is there to protect her, and will say nothing else until he knows that he can trust her. Jenna and Ric walk in, obviously having had a sleepover. Way to go Jenna. She’s confused as to why John is there, seeing as the whole family pretty much hates him. She tells him he can’t stay at the house. She’s the legal guardian so she makes the rules. This prompts John to tell Jenna that he is Elena’s biological father. Because he’s a super class act, he immediately takes off after saying this, leaving Elena to explains things to Jenna.

Stefan and Damon discuss John’s return while hanging out in Stefan’s room. Damon doesn’t understand why Stefan brought John to Mystic Falls, what with John trying to kill Damon previously. Stefan tells him that he was looking for Isobel and found John, who he believes can help protect Elena. He doesn’t trust Elijah or the deal Elena made with him. John has knowledge about the sacrifice but he isn’t telling anyone yet. Damon is highly agitated, which Stefan attributes to Rose. Damon tries to play down his feelings, saying he only knew Rose “for five minutes” but Stefan understands how much he cared. As Damon leaves, Stefan receives a text from Caroline telling him that there is an emergency.

The doorbell rings at the Lockwood Mansion and Tyler answers the door to find Jules. Boo hiss.

Caroline lets Stefan into her house, filling him in on the Tyler situation. Stefan immediately accuses Jules of telling Ty the truth. He promises to keep Damon in the dark, knowing that he would use it as an opportunity to kill Tyler. He worries that Tyler will try to retaliate against them, but Caroline thinks they can get to him first and reason. After all, they are best buddies now. Good luck with that.

Back at the Lockwood Mansion, Jules is pounding it home that vampires and werewolves can’t be friends. It reminds me of The Fox and the Hound. So sad. She wants Tyler to leave town with her so she can teach him the way of the wolf. She is seriously lame, describing it as her “duty and honor” to help him. Gag me. Ty isn’t about to leave his mother behind so he can gallivant around with a stranger. It’s nice to see someone using their head in Mystic Falls. Besides, I don’t buy Jules in the role of Mr. Miyagi for one second.

Damon arrives at the Gilbert house looking for John. Elena tells him that John dropped the biological dad bomb on Jenna and took off. They discuss whether or not they trust him (nope) and what they are going to do about it. Damon suggests killing him but Elena is a party pooper so he decides to do the adult thing and have a “civil conversation” with John. I wish that was a euphemism for ass kicking for seeing as Elena elects to come along it will probably be boring and non-violent.

Tyler is in his father’s office at the mansion when Stefan appears out of nowhere. Ty tries to flee but Stefan stops him, swearing he just wants to talk. Ty is suspicious given that Stefan broke in. Carol calls to Tyler, who attempts to leave the room once more but Stefan vamps out, pushes him against a wall and threatens him to keep quiet. Carol leaves for a memorial and I’m having a hard time keeping track of who is being mourned this week. Damn Mystic Falls and the high body count.

Jules arrives at an RV in the woods, calling for a man named Brady. He appears behind her all stealthy and they kiss. I can’t tell if this guy is attractive or not. Sometimes I think yes but then I look again and think no. It seems Brady was called to town by Jules to get vengeance against the vamps for Mason’s death. He acts like a tough guy, saying he isn’t afraid of the vampires. That just means he’s stupid. Homey, you’re only as strong as a vamp during the full moon. The other 29 or 30 nights of the month you’re just a normal dude. I hope Damon rips his heart out.

Hot or not?

Hot or not?

Stefan and Tyler are still grappling with each other at the Lockwood Mansion. Ty wants answers about Mason and Stefan has “a lot” for them to talk about. So start talking already.

John checks in the Carol at the memorial in Mystic Falls’ town square. She tells him that Damon is leading the council and instructs John to go to him for updates. As Carol leaving, Jeremy arrives. John has a little pity party about how no one wants him around. Boo freaking hoo. Jer tells him that he can’t rush in all anti-vamp if he wants to win over the family. John asks about the resurrection ring, which makes Jeremy think that he came to take it back. John is noble (for once) and tells Jer he doesn’t want the ring.

On the other side of the square, Jonas approaches Bonnie. She is pissed that she trusted Luka only for him to betray her. He tries to tell her that while it’s true they are working for Elijah, they are also trying to keep her safe. Bonnie is skeptical, even after Jonah’s spiel about what an honorable man Elijah is. Jeremy interrupts them, attempting to be threatening (?) by asking if there’s a problem. Oh young Jeremy. You are so NOT intimidating.

Jenna and Ric are having lunch at the Mystic Grill, discussing Elena’s biological parents. To say Jenna is overwhelmed is an understatement. Her niece is really the product of her sister’s husband’s brother and her boyfriend’s dead wife. That’s soap opera shit right there. John enters the Grill and asks if he can join them. Does this guy seriously not understand how unwanted he is? Elena and Damon arrive as John prepares to sit down. She begs Damon to “be the better man” which I find heartbreaking. Damon is already one million times the man that John will ever be. What does a seventeen year old girl know about it?

Does anyone else find it tacky that 'Mystic Grill' is printed on the bottom of the memorial photo?

Does anyone else find it tacky that ‘Mystic Grill’ is printed on the bottom of the memorial photo?

Stefan and Tyler are finally talking straight with each other. Stefan reminds him of what a great, loyal friend Caroline is. I love that he tells Tyler to stop being a dick to her. Ty brings up the whole vampires vs. werewolves thing, which is totally outdated. Stefan believes they can be friends, seeing as they hang in the same circle and go to the same school. Trust me, hanging in the same social circle does not a friendship make. My friends had tons of friends that I would rather set myself on fire than hang out with. Despite the chill nature of the talk, Tyler answers the phone when Jules calls, yelling for help. Stefan takes the phone and throws it on the desk, pissed that Ty doesn’t understand he is trying to save his life.

Jules hangs up the phone, worried about Tyler. She rejoins Brady and tells him they are a problem.

Damon joins John in lighting a memorial candle for the dead campers at the Grill. John doesn’t trust Damon, citing the whole originals can compel other vampires thing. Damon assures him that both he and Stefan are on the vervain, preventing them from being compelled. Damon threatens to kill John if he doesn’t spill all he knows about Klaus. John is super annoying, telling Damon he has to trust him before he will talk. And you know how you don’t earn trust? By threatening to kill the other person.

Matt and Caroline meet in the parking lot of the Grill. She admits to avoiding him a little and he asks if they can talk later to clear up the weirdness between them. She offers to swing by when his shift is over. They are so adorable. He heads inside to start his shift and Caroline walks to her car. Unfortunately Jules is waiting for her. They go back and forth over whether Caroline knows where Tyler is, with Jules macing Care in the face with vervain spray. Bitch. Caroline heals and attempts to attack but Brady shoots her in the head!

Caroline is alive but wounded, locked in a cage inside of Brady’s RV. She screams as the wooden bullet in her head works its way out. She tries to unlock the cage but is busted by Brady. He is an insane sadist, shooting her with another wooden bullet.

I really need his heart to be ripped out. Someone please get on this.

I really need his heart to be ripped out. Someone please get on this.

Stefan is still trying to reason with Tyler at the mansion. He gives a big speech about wanting to have a life in Mystic Falls complete with friends and a family. He is interrupted when he receives a call from Caroline. Stupid Jules is on the phone, threatening to kill Caroline if he doesn’t bring Tyler to the clearing by Wickery Falls. She has Brady shoot Caroline to elicit a scream that she uses as proof of life. Jules and Brady need to die in a horrible fire. Right now.

Jenna introduces Damon to her friend Andie Star, the news anchor from the dead camper story that he watched earlier. Back when he was shirtless and just showered. Good times. Andie offers to buy him a drink but he blows her off. He rejoins Elena, telling her that he is steering clear of women. Poor Damon. Elena receives a phone call from Stefan. It doesn’t look like he’s giving her good news.

Damon and Elena move from the bar to the bathroom to discuss the Tyler situation. Strange secret meeting place. Damon is pissed that everyone has been keeping secrets from him and wants to kill Tyler (as predicted). Elena asks him to get Caroline back but leave Tyler out of it. He calls her out on trying to manipulate him into being a good guy. Once again she asks him to be the better man. Their conversation is interrupted by John, who wants to know why they are alone in the bathroom together. I hope my dad would ask the same thing. Damon leaves to get Caroline back but only after John agrees to keep Elena at the Grill.

Caroline is crying in her cage while Brady alternates between interrogating her and shooting her with a squirt gun for of vervain. She begs him to let her out and he responds by throwing what appear to be little wooden sticks into her neck. Eventually he joins Jules outside. She asks him to be smart (impossible), reminding him they are there for Tyler. He gives her a stupid line about how crossing one of them is the same as crossing all of them. Boo hiss.


WTF kind of lame weapons are these?

Elena exits the bathroom but John blocks her from leaving the Grill. He chides her for believing that her deal with Elijah will keep her safe. She responds by throwing his attempted murder of Damon and Stefan in his face. He gives a kind of apology, admitting that he has made mistakes. Elena gets pissed when he says they are family, telling him that he may be her father but she’ll never be his daughter. Cold.

Jules is alone in the woods when she hears a sound; Stefan and Tyler have arrived at the clearing. Stefan offers to exchange Tyler for Caroline. He tells Jules to leave town and she tells him she won’t leave without Tyler. Just as Stefan says Tyler is free to make his own decisions, Damon arrives. He demands she hand over Caroline, reminding her that it is far from a fair fight without the full moon. Cue a bunch of wolves emerging from the woods with stakes, crossbows and good old fire. The Brothers Salvatore send Tyler over to Jules and prepare to fight.

Damon rushes at Jules but she does some crazy gymnastics back flip off the side of the RV and runs away. A guy tries to attack Stefan with a flamethrower but Stef is able to super speed and grab the guy, using him as a weapon against two other dudes. Yet another guy jumps off the roof of the RV to attack Damon but Damon rips his heart out midair. It is awesome.


Tyler runs into the RV and sees Caroline locked in the cage. She points out the latch on the door but he hesitates to open it. Not cool bro.

Stefan snaps one guys neck and heads toward another with a crossbow. He shoots but Stefan is able to catch the stake.

Caroline yells Tyler’s name repeatedly until he snaps out of what fugue he’s in and heads toward the cage.

Stefan fights with a wolf and ends up staking him. Another shoots a stake at him but he catches it in midair and throws it into the guy’s neck. It is also awesome. His spree of badassness ends when he gets staked in the back, falling to the ground.


Tyler unlocks the cage and struggle to open the door. Damon and Brody duke it out while he release Caroline. Damon gets the upper hand until Jules arrives and shoots him with a wooden bullet. I really hate this chick. Caroline exits the RV but Jules grabs her, throwing her against the RV and pointing a gun at her back. Tyler sees this and does nothing despite locking eyes with Care. Why such a douchenozzle Ty?

Brody prepares to stake Damon when he suddenly grabs his head and starts screaming. Jules and the other wolves soon follow suit. Witchy magic? Caroline and Tyler are unaffected, wondering aloud what’s going on. Jonas appears in full spell casting mode. He is there to keep up Elijah’s end of the bargain he made with Elena. The vamps get up and clear out, leaving Tyler the only one standing. Jonas tells him to pass on a message to the other wolves: get lost or face the consequences. Ty has a little sad as he looks around at the incapacitated wolves.

It’s a little hard to picture so the full fight scene is here:

Stefan drops Caroline at her house, offering to come inside so she won’t be alone. She tells him that she isn’t “girly little Caroline” anymore and can handle herself. Seeing as she was just tortured and almost betrayed by a close friend, I’d say she earns a good cry. He wishes her good night before leaving.

Damon opens the door at the Salvatore Boarding House where surprise! John is waiting. He wants to finish their conversation about protecting Elena. He has decided to trust Damon, giving him a dagger and vial. The vial contains ash from a white oak tree that dates back to when the originals were created. To kill an original, the dagger is dipped into the ash and put through the original’s heart. John tells him he learned this from Isobel, who is also working to keep Klaus out of Mystic Falls. Before he leaves, John tells Damon they are on the same side where Elena is concerned. How touching.

Caroline is examining her wounds in her bedroom when Matt calls. She apologizes for not meeting him after his shift, saying Bonnie had a friend emergency. Except Matt is at the Grill where Bonnie and Jeremy are giggling at a table together. He asks if she is will Bonnie right now to which she replies in the affirmative. Oh Caroline. He wishes her good night before hanging up. Someone please give this kid a hug.

Worst date EVER.

Worst date EVER.

There is a knock at Caroline’s door. Who should it be but Tyler, the world’s worst friend. He asks if she is okay, claiming that he didn’t know she would be taken. He apologizes but only kind of, saying he doesn’t know who to trust since she lied to him. She tells him that she was lying to protect her friends, including him. She is, justifiably, pissed that he stood by and didn’t do anything when the wolves were going to kill them. Ty apologizes but she isn’t having it, telling him that they are no longer friends and never will be before slamming the door in his face.

Meanwhile, Elena and John have a heart to heart in the Gilbert kitchen. She is super bitchy, telling him she doesn’t want him there even if he’s trying to protect her. He gives her a bracelet as a peace offering. It belonged to Miranda, her real mother. He explains that while she lost her parents, he lost his brother and his way. He doesn’t think he’ll be able to fix things with her, but wants to protect the family in any way that he can. He takes off and Elena starts crying. She turns and sees Stefan, rushing to him. They hug it out while she cries about not believing John. She asks about Caroline and Stefan asks for her help.

Tyler knocks on the door of Brady’s RV and is let in by Jules. He apologizes for all the wolves Stefan and Damon killed, and tells them Mason was after the moonstone. They ask if Mason found the stone and he answers in the affirmative but is unable to tell them where it is now.

Caroline answers a knock at her door. Stefan has come to check up on her and brought Bonnie and Elena along. The girls are there for a sleepover (yay!). Caroline, overwhelmed with all the feels, begins crying and the girls have a group hug. Elena mouths that she loves Stefan and he returns the sentiment. Those crazy kids.


Stefan is so girly, I’m surprised that he didn’t join in.

Damon is in his bathtub with Andie Star, news reporter. He tells her that he invited her there as a distraction and she refers to herself as a booty call. He admits to being in love with a woman that he can’t have and it is driving him crazy. He tells her that he doesn’t trust himself around anyone, seeing as he’s bad and does things like kill people. Andie becomes frightened but he compels her not to be afraid. He tells her that he kills people because he likes it; it’s in his nature. Elena wants him to be a better man, which isn’t in his nature, thus the conflict. Andie tells him that love makes people change, but he doesn’t want to hear it. He commands her to stop talking and kiss him. As if he needs compulsion for that. Have you seen him? He bites her neck, drinking a little. At least they’re in the tub?


John arrives at the tomb to talk to Katherine. He tells her that Isobel was busy so she sent him. Looks like they are working to free Katherine from the tomb. Oh shit.


Various unnamed wolves


DAMON: “It means I care, Stefan. It means I’m changing, evolving into a man capable of greatness. Better watch your back because I may just have to go get a hero hairdo of my own and steal your thunder.”


Stephen Amell As Brady

Stephen Amell as Brady

Dawn Olivieri as Andie Star

Dawn Olivieri as Andie Star


Last.fm_play.png “Don’t You Remember” by Adele. Jenna and Ric discuss John being Elena’s father at the Grill; Elena asks Damon to play nice with John.

Last.fm_play.png “Only One” by Alex Band. Damon threatens to kill John; Matt and Caroline make plans to talk after his shift.

Last.fm_play.png “Stay” by Hurts. Jenna introduces Andie Star to Damon.

Last.fm_play.png “Strip Me” by Natasha Bedingfield. John tries to stop Elena from leaving the Grill; Elena tells John that she will never be his daughter.

Last.fm_play.png “Losing Your Memory” by Ryan Star. Stefan brings Elena and Bonnie to Caroline’s for a sleepover; Damon admits to Andie that he is in love with Elena.


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