For Your Consideration: Buffy the Vampire Slayer, 4.04 “Fear, Itself”

That’s right, another Buffy Halloween episode. I just can’t help myself.

TV SPOT

OBSERVATIONS

Of course Xander’s pumpkin would mock him with it’s GIANT eye holes. Side note: I am SUPER PUMPED to begin carving a pumpkin (or five). Last year Boyfriend and I carved the best pumpkin ever.

Of course

Of course.

Depressed Buffy is so hard to watch. Please don’t be sad about Parker Abrams. And definitely don’t use the life of a pumpkin as a metaphor for him breaking your heart. Because your heart can’t be broken over such a douchey guy. Though the pumpkin thing is pretty clever.

How can she be so sad when she has a beautiful pumpkin to carve?

How can she be so sad when she has a beautiful pumpkin to carve?

Fantasia is kind of creepy. Some might even say it is creepier than Phantasm. The sequence with Chernabog summoning evil spirits from the grave can be pretty intense for a five year old.

fantasia

I wish that I had the money/ability/time to make my own haunted house. Lots of creative ideas here but very little follow through. Maybe I’ll get wacky and make some cheesecloth spiderwebs.

Why is a random guy wearing a demon mask running around town, jumping out at innocent blonde girls? I am under the impression that it is not quite Halloween yet, therefore he totally deserves to get punched in the face.

Buffy’s off the shoulder floral printed top is a sight to behold. And by that I mean it makes my eyes bleed every time it makes an appearance.

There are no words to describe how much this shirt crushes my soul.

There are no words to describe how much this shirt crushes my soul.

Oz’s talk about Willow and the lure of magic power is heavily foreshadowing the future. Could it be that Whedon and company already had the Dark Willow arc planned? Of course! Who am I trying to kid?

I just don’t understand Buffy having a sad over a guy she hung out with for maybe a month and slept with one time. When I saw my ex in the cafeteria I just imagined smashing my tray over his head and suddenly I would feel much better. Maybe she should try that tactic.

You are eighteen. Stop.

You are eighteen. Stop.

Sombrero Giles is my favorite Giles! Though he totally should have saved it for Cinco de Mayo. Where does one even buy a sombrero like that?

gilessombrero

The Hawaiian shirt worn by Zack the black power ranger is awesome but unseasonable. Also, I can’t believe he didn’t know that Arbor Day was the exception to the ‘use a holiday as a chance to bang’ rule. It’s so obvious.

You can only see a little bit, but trust me. It's horrible.

You can only see a little bit, but trust me, it just gets better.

If I were Xander I would be afraid to tell Anya to dress up as something scary precisely because she was a vengeance demon. Can you imagine some of the sick costumes she could come up with?

Why would Buffy go to Professor Walsh to get the class assignment when both Willow and Oz are in the class with her? It feels like she’s asking to receive feelings of anger and/or disappointment.

Riley Finn and that hair. Please make it stop. Also, why does he sound as if he’s a forty year old when he’s supposed to be a student? Staying home on Halloween night to grade papers? Even stick in the mud Agent Finn could take the opportunity to cut loose and party.

I don’t understand the frat boy definition of scary. Somehow orange and black spider garland makes the cut? I’m terrified of spiders but even I find this to be adorable.

Also, this is wholly untrue.

Also, this is wholly untrue.

Why would the frat guys copy a demon summoning spell onto the floor? Never copy occult symbols from books people. Has this ever led to good things happening?

Not even once.

Not even once.

I’ve always wanted to set up a bowl of peeled grapes as eyeballs. Perhaps my Halloween party guests this year will get to experience this little treat.

Little Red Riding Hood has never been the cutting edge of costumes. I’m sorry but someone had to say it.

I like the idea of Willow forcing fun upon Buffy and axe murdering Parker. She has my vote for bestest best friend ever.

The lobster costume of the guy in the dorm hallway is absolutely brilliant. I just don’t understand how he made it.

How is this a thing?

How is this a thing?

Time for freaky shit to start happening! If I removed a blindfold to find that I was holding a handful of eyeballs I don’t think I’d just stand there and scream. I’m picturing a lot of puking out and hurling the eyes as far away from me as possible.

Please continue to hold the EYEBALLS in your hand.

Please continue to hold the EYEBALLS in your hand.

Xander looks pretty debonair in his tux but ruins it by huskily asking Buffy what’s in her basket. It makes him sound more child molestery than suave and sophisticated.

James Bond he is not.

James Bond he is not.

I’m really over the whole mopey Buffy thing. First she’s super awkward during pumpkin carving, then she freaks out and abandons her lunch in the caf, and now she’s having a sad about being the third wheel. Please get over Parker before you make me want to punch you.

All sorts of freaky shit is happening when the Scoobies approach the house. The creepiest of all is the princess that goes from being knocked out on a couch to smiling.

freakychick

Disturbing on ALL the levels.

Why are the decorations fake when the Scoobies walk in while they were oh so real when Frat Boy fell down the stairs? Is it because the evil of the house hasn’t gotten to them yet? The real tarantula walked on Willow but the skeleton was fake. Real bats flew at them but a rubber bat was on the floor. I’M SO CONFUSED.

A window was just walled up from out of nowhere! There are disappearing stairs and doors. The skeleton is now alive. This house is for real haunted.

I love that this episode is all about personal fears getting blown out of proportion. It’s easy to turn on your friends when you’re scared and Willow does it in the most adorable way possible.

soisyourface

Oz sitting in the bath tub praying not to change makes me have a sad. The thing he’s most afraid of is losing control of himself. Can someone please give Oz a hug?

Feeling the feels.

Feeling the feels.

I find Xander and Willow to be a little annoying in their insecurities. Xander is afraid that his friends are leaving him out of all their college fun so he becomes invisible to them. Willow is upset that her friends don’t trust her new-found magic and she loses control of her spells. It just seems a little petty to me.

Chainsaw Giles is my second favorite Giles. Why oh why wasn’t this man given his own spin-off? If they were seriously considering making one for Faith, Watcher should have been a thing that happened.

"Look it's Giles."

“Look it’s Giles.”

Oh Buffy! You should always read all of the instructions for stopping a demon before plunging fist first into floors. Lucky for you Gachnar is tiny and easily squashed underfoot.

Who's a tiny fear demon?

Who’s a tiny fear demon?

Always translate the inscription!

gachnar

COSTUME WATCH

Buffy as Little Red Riding Hood and Xander as James Bond

Buffy as Little Red Riding Hood and Xander as James Bond

Willow as Joan of Arc and Oz as God

Willow as Joan of Arc and Oz as God

Anya as a bunny

Anya as a bunny

QUOTABLES

XANDER: “Prepare to have your spines tingled and your gooses bumped by the terrifying… Fantasia. Fantasia?”

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